No Time To Waste Time

I realize Im an absolute DOUCHE for taking reality television seriously enough to blog about it, however..

The world in general, should take a note from Jake, Mr. Bachelor Pilot Man.

Instead of dragging things out for the ratings, he just kicks chicks off, the moment he knows she's not the one. And that's how we should all respond to feelings, I think. I believe in fate and destiny and stuff, and that there's one person out there who may not be perfect, but will be the best person for us, and if we're getting strung along by some guy too afraid to speak his feelings, we could totally wander mindlessly through the checkout at the grocery store and not notice the handsome hunk behind us, who was SUPPOSED to be the one, but we didnt look at him, because we were too busy trying to figure out what to make our current boyfriend for dinner, even though that current boyfriend is thinking about Nintendo and beer, and anything BUT us because he's nowhere near loving you enough to see himself marrying you, EVER, so why should he think about you right now?

(Yes, that paragraph was just 2 sentences.)

I just think love is a precious commodity, and shouldnt be wasted on people that arent wasting theirs on us. I think its cowardly and very asshole-like if a person breaks up with you, and then throws in,

"Ive been thinking about this for a long time."

"Really?! While I was grocery shopping and ignoring the sex machiene behind me, and then sweating in your kitchen, and burning myself while dipping strawberries in chocolate and shaving my legs..you were thinking about dumping me?"

"Well.."

"No, while I was spending a month's salary on your Christmas present 2 months ago, you were thinking about breaking up with me?"

"Well, I.."

"So when I agreed to let you cover me in chocolate and take my picture and ACCIDENTALLY send it to all your douchebag friends..you were thinking about dumping me?"

It's just rude.

When I was in Grade 11, I broke up with my first boyfriend, whom Id dated for like a month lol, because I knew already that I was never going to marry him. I want hoping to marry ANYONE in the near future, but I knew that even in the distant future, I was not going to become Mrs. Hull. He talked about "boobies and dinkies" and after our first make out, my first ever make out, he assured me, "If you get sick, its normal. Its our different saliva mixing for the first time, youll be fine". WHY would I want to drag THAT out in hopes it'll maybe, possibly, likely not get better?

If youre out there, and youre honestly, seriously questioning the person youre in a relationhip with right now, or if youve noticed yourself questioning it before, once or twice..especially if youve thought about it THREE times, I just believe its time to end it. It's not fair to you and its not fair to this other person. If you think you'll just give it another month and THEN think about it again, that's a whole month in which they could be finding, or be found by another person better for them, its a whole month in which you could be finding the actual one.

Life doesnt last forever, and love is pretty much an endangered species, so we need to end things, maybe break a few hearts, send a few skanks home before that night's rose ceremony, until we've found the one we REALLY want to spend it all on.

(Unless youre my boyfriend. Im deliriously in some serious love with you, so please string me along as long as possible. Thanks!)

Ps. If your boyfriend wears turtlenecks in Chinatown, and sends you and your wine away from his bed, its time to move on and keep your eyes peeled for someone less gay. Unless youre gay. I guess!